Tuesday, 14 October 2014

Donkey's Diseases

My previous blog post was the twentieth blog post of The Hugehog Blog, so I decided to celebrate this with a Special Edition blog post. This particular topic, Donkey's Diseases, was recommended to me by Miss Lettuce. Let's not waste any more time, shall we?

The first disease I'd like to discuss based on alphabetical order is abscess. This is no fun disease. No, on the contrary this is a disease that's not fun at all. What if you had abscess in your hoof? You wouldn't want that to happen, would you? Well luckily for you, if you do suffer from hoof abscesses, then a warm bath may be adequate treatment already [1].

A more serious and moreover life-threatening donkey's disease is grass sickness[2]. I mean come on, as a donkey all you do every single day is standing on grass and eating that same sh*t over and over again. Of course you get sick and tired of it after a while. There's no known cure for this disease yet, but my bright mind tells me that taking donkeys inside the house will make them 73.1% less suicidal already.

Hoof abscess: See abscess.

Foot abscess: See abscess.

Hoof deformity: See a doctor.

Finally the most prevalent Donkey Disease: Stress & Mental Conditions. I know what you're thinking - donkeys have so much spare time standing on grass getting sick with each other, the only thing they can do is thinking about life. But that much time does not do the donkeys any good. In fact, that's the sole reason why donkeys seem so stressed all the time. They have plenty of time to think things through - they have too much time, rather. They cannot think about anything without overthinking. And overthinking always leads to stress, and retardedness. That's exactly why donkeys are retards. I mean have you ever seen a donkey wear seat belts? Have you ever seen donkeys solve sudoku puzzles? Of course not, because they overthink all the time. They wonder what makes sudoku puzzles limited to numbers, ranging from 1 to 9, instead of puzzling with cake and bacon[3]. If only there was a cure against overthinking...

[1] Abscess as a Donkey Disease

[2] Grass Sickness as an obvious Donkey Disease

[3] Stress and Retarded Donkeys

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